I Still Feel So Guilty

It's been almost ten years, and I still think about it. My best friend, Sarah, she was always so trusting. We were in college, and I was so jealous of her boyfriend, Mark. He was everything I wanted – kind, funny, smart. I knew Sarah loved him, but I convinced myself that if she just wasn't in the picture, he'd see that I was the better choice.

So, I started spreading rumors. Little things, at first. Saying she was flirting with other guys, exaggerating stories about her drinking. It worked. They broke up. And I swooped in. Mark and I dated for a few months, but it felt hollow. He wasn't the same, and I wasn't happy. We broke up too.

Sarah and I haven't spoken since. I tried to apologize once, years later, but she hung up on me. I deserve it, I know. But the guilt eats at me every day. I ruined a friendship and hurt two people because of my own selfishness. I wish I could take it back, but I can't. All I can do is live with the regret.