I should have called more

Grandma, it's me. I know you're gone, and I know I can't actually send this, but I have to say it. I messed up. I was always too busy. School, then work, then trying to have some kind of life. Every time you called, I'd let it go to voicemail half the time. Then I'd call back a few days later, or sometimes a week. I'd tell myself it was okay, you understood. But you're gone now, and I'd give anything for one more of those calls. One more chance to hear your stories, even the ones I'd heard a million times. One more chance to tell you I loved you. I'm so sorry I wasn't a better grandson. I miss you so much it hurts. Please forgive me.